Turnabout Luncheon

[The_Wright_Way]

"Egads! My roast is ruined!" Seymour cried out in anguish as he looked at his flaming oven. "If the Superintendent finds out I can't cook, then he'll think I'm incompetent. I'll be fired!" Suddenly a smug smirk spread acrossed his lips. "But what if, he doesn't find out. Because he won't live to." Seymour grabbed some rat poison out of the cupboard, quickly dashing over to Krusty Burger to get some 'steamed hams' before sprinkling the poison on Chalmers final meal. "Oh ho ho. Delightfully devilish Seymour."

~

July 1st, 4:00 PM

District Court

Courtroom No. 1

"And that concludes how Bart Simpson poisoned our beloved Superintendent." Skinner surmised as he finished his testimony.

"OBJECTION!"

Phoenix slammed his hands on the desk. "You claim that these 'steamed hams' you served were cooked by yourself, correct?"

"Of course."

"Well, Principal, I'm afraid that's not possible. Tell me, does this burger look steamed to you?"

Skinner began sweating nervously.

"Oh no, I never meant to imply that they were actually steamed. It's a regional dialect. Upstate New York."

"Really? Well I'm from Utica and I'd never heard the phrase Steamed Hams." The Judge chimed in.

"Oh no, it's an Albany expression."

"OBJECTION!" Phoenix slammed on the desk again. "What part of grilling a burger produces steam!"

"OBJECTION!" Edgeworth tapped his head impatiently. "Wright, what exactly does any of this have to do with the case at hand?"

"I'm glad you asked, take a look at Skinner's family recipe and compare it to the recipe for Krusty Burgers."

Edgeworth's composure vanished. "That's...!"

"It's the exact same. Skinner didn't cook these at all, he ordered them from Krusty Burger!"

"OBJECTION! But the cause of the fire came from the suspect heating up the oven to overcook one of these burgers."

"OBJECTION! I'm not denying the cause of the fire, I'm denying when it happened. It happened before the murder, which is why Skinner left to get the burgers in the first place!"

"But if the food didn't come from the kitchen and the defendant wasn't spotted at Krusty Burger, the only one who could've poisoned the food was...!" The Judge realized.

"Exactly Your Honor, the only one who could've poisoned the food was the witness himself!"

Skinner began fidgeting nervously. "I, well, uh, you see, uh, it wasn't actually a fire it was, uh..... Aurora Borealis?"

"OBJECTION! Aurora Borealis? At that time of year, at that time of day, in this part of the country, localised entirely within your kitchen?!?!?!"

Skinner struggled to adjust his tie before breaking off into a run, with Phoenix taking off after him. Phoenix tackled Seymour and sent the two skidding down a hallway. "You can't escape the truth, it's time to pay for your crime!"

~

Speed Equalized.

Phoenix has his evidence.

Phoenix is casually and accidentally 1.8 Megajoules vs Skinner's 7.3 Megajoules.


vs.

 

[Junkoposter]

'''y e s'''

 

[Stalker_Maggot]

So, this is hard

Principal Skinner:

+AP

+Durability

+Combat skills

Phoenix:

+Intelligence

+Haxs

+Range

The issue is Phoenix can keep Skinner at a range, but Skinner only needs a few hits to win. Phoenix's soul haxs **** up Skinner. From what I've heard, their is no reason why Phoenix doesn't soul hax in character.

So I'm leaning towards Phoenix 5.1/10

 

[Buttersamuri]

Yea. Phoenix FRA. Skinner has no way to get in close when Phoenix can yeets him away with wind, Bling him with light, and one shot with soul hacks. Skinner can win if he gets close. But him getting close probably isn't happening. All it takes is a finger point to rip his soul out or cause a force of wind that's big enough to cover a courtroom. Which means Skinner also isn't dodging it.

 

[Jackythejack]

Phoenix's soul hax wouldn't be a thing he'd ever actually try to do in combat. He's not combat skilled enough to actually rely on his hax to such a great degree.

The other points sure, they make sense, but Phoenix's soul hax wouldn't be something he immediately go towards in a fight, or at all honestly, if we wanna go that route. It seems like a tactic he'd only use if bloodlusted.

 

[Buttersamuri]

And what's that based on exactly? We never see him get in combat. So you can't really say if that's true or not. We don't know how he reacts to getting into a fight. We also know when lives are at stake. He is willing to like when a spirit was possessing maya. He literally says he doesn't care about guilty or innocent anymore or the trail. And then soul hacks her. And aside from that. We don't have any instance where Phoenix gets in a fight with someone. So we can't say it's out of character or something he wouldn't resort to. I definitely didn't say it's always the first thing he does. I personally see him wind hacking the heck out of Skinner making it impossible to get close. But realistically. At this moment. He uses soul haxs at one point or another. Until disproven

 

[Jackythejack]

That's exactly the reason why he wouldn't do it. He's never been in a fight, so it doesn't make sense as to why he would do any of this. His combat experience is literally zero. There's nothing there, so we can't say he'd use his skills to the most efficient level ever. We don't know if he'd efficiently use it all the time to actually spam the heck out of it or not. Phoenix doesn't have the fighting mentality to use things like that efficiently. He's smart, sure, but not combat smart.

I'm still iffy on the soul hax as a whole either way, whether it's work on a normal person or not. Remember Maya was being possessed, there were two souls possessing a body. I don't think Phoenix would actually be able to just remove a soul out of a random person's body. I think it only really worked because of the fact that Maya was possessed and had something alien inside of her that Phoenix could actually yell out. We can't assume that it works on just anyone without actual proper showing that it does. I don't know if Phoenix would ever even think about using that. He still doesn't actually...you know, kill something? He'd try his best to take the least lethal option, even if he's "willing" to kill, that doesn't mean that he'll actually do it. This is Phoenix for crying out loud. The man is practically never violent.

 

[Buttersamuri]

Just because he hasn't been in a fight. Doesn't mean he wouldn't use the abilities he has. Phoenix being so smart would more likely resort to Said abilities. Even people weak in the mind would understand Shooting wind, Explosion, light, light tornadoes, or ripping soul out from a distance >>>>> Running up and punching. You don't need to be combat smart to understand using those from a distance is better than getting up close. You just have to know basic logic.

She didn't have an "alien" inside her. She had a soul. Just a normal soul. Which Phoenix could remove. Unless it's ever brought up or said that doing this only works on souls possessing. We can't assume against it. All we know is Phoenix is fully able to remove a soul from a body. And it's never said it's limited to just a soul possessing someone. It's just he can remove souls. So as far as we can best assume. Yes he can remove peoples souls. Saying it in a different way isn't gonna change the fact. Phoenix removed a soul from a body, and nothing suggested his power was limited to some form of only possesion. And yes. I said he likely isn't going to resort to it at the start. I already explained that he would eventually resort to it if he is willing to kill. I believe he likely resorts to his wind light attacks to blind and rag doll Skinner. Making it basically impossible for Skinner to get close and do anything in the fight besides being a ragdoll. And if that doesn't go into working, and Skinner is still getting back up. Phoenix eventually resorts to what he has to do. Because his life would be on the line at that point.

Also with evidence. Totally forgot he had that. Also can pierce damage with his blades or gun him down. Adding that to my reasons

 

[Jackythejack]

Guns he doesn't know how to use and blades he doesn't have any combat experience in. Not nearly as helpful now.

Never said it was an alien. Said it was an alien soul. Something that didn't belong in her body. If Phoenix hasn't shown the ability to remove a person's soul out of their body, and not just remove a soul that is possessing them, we can't assume he can rip the soul out of any, non-possessed average joe.

 

[Buttersamuri]

A gun isn't a super fancy piece of tech that Phoenix wouldn't be able to figure out. I'm sure Phoenix knows that pulling s trigger makes a gun go Boom. He just has to aim and pull the trigger. He may not be super advanced on gun and weapon mastery. But he isn't dealing with someone who could up and start dodging gunfire.

You can't assume that. You are baseless assuming he can only handle spirit possession. Even though there's no evidence to prove it. All we have is Phoenix able to remove a soul from a body. It was a soul possessing someone. But that in no way showed he was limited to just that. We simply have to go on the fact he removed a soul from a body and nothing else.

 

[Torlikoff]

If you've never used a gun before you probably don't know about the safety or how to aim it.

 

[Jackythejack]

Except Phoenix also has had to be accurate. To be efficient with a gun requires actual training with a firearm, just so you know. No one can just pick up a gun and suddenly be crazy accurate with it.

Also I can spin that back on you there. We don't have proof that Phoenix can rip someone's normal soul out of there body. He's never shown to rip someone's original soul out of there body, but instead a soul that doesn't belong. That's a distinct difference, and that's all he's currently been shown to do. When it comes down to it, we can't prove that Phoenix can just rip any soul out of a body. He hasn't shown the capabilities.

 

[TriforcePower1]

Phoenix wouldn't use soul manipulation in a fight. Even ignoring the fact that it was a possession, Phoenix has used it literally once.

I can more likely see Phoenix using Wind Manipulation as that's what he always does when he gains the upper hand in a debate. Phoenix using a gun is also unlikely, and recoil isn't something you can immediately adapt to.

 

[The_Wright_Way]

Recoil isn't something most normal people can adapt to, but does that really hold for a wall level character?

 

[Torlikoff]

If the gun hurts other wall level characters, yes.

 

[Jackythejack]

I mean I'm pretty sure the gun is technically 9-B for hurting other 9-Bs. It should still have at least some recoil that Phoenix isn't used to.

 

[Buttersamuri]

I never said he would be crazy accurate. But pointing a gun and shooting at someone isn't super hard. As long as he hits skinner, it's gonna hurt and if not kill, take him down. He doesn't need to be amazing with a gun to point it at someone's chest and fire. Unless Skinner was fast enough to dodge gunfire, then there's where skill would be needed. But he isn't. Not unless he was a real good distance away.

And No you can't. Because our proof is we have seen him rip a soul out of a body before. Nothing says he couldn't have done that to anyone else. We get no clear limitations on this skill, and nothing indicates he couldn't. The fact that he was able to interact and get the soul out and nothing ever says or suggest it was only cause the soul was possessing is enough proof on its own. This power needs to get Disproven. It doesn't need more proof than what we have. It isn't right to assume he couldn't even though we can clearly see he has interacted with a soul before. So my point still stands.

 

[Torlikoff]

It is actually rather hard for someone who's never shot a gun before to be accurate. It's incredibly precise and difficult when you know nothing and are also in the middle of a fight.

 

[Jackythejack]

Actually no we can't assume that, though. When we're not given clear limitations we can only go with what we're given. What we're given is it works on a possessed person, so we can't assume anything else. Having no clear limits doesn't automatically mean it can do anything that the ability is capable of. We don't have proof that Phoenix can rip a soul out of a normal body.

What we do have is proof he can rip a soul out of a possessed body. He performed an exorcism. His instance of using that ability (his one instance of using it) is under very specific circumstances. We don't have anything to say it works outside of those circumstances, so we have to assume that ability is specific.

Also can yo I please respond to the thread I posted on your wall

 

[CursedGentleman]

>Turnabout Luncheon

>It's not Shaggy

My disappointment is immense and my day is ruined.

But about this fight.

I'm voting for Skinner unless we assume that Phoenix is just going to be pointing at Skinner and using hax, but even then, I don't think that would work much considering the difference in AP and I don't think that Phoenix is going to outright rip the soul out of someone.

 

[GoCommitDi]

does phoenix have a calc somewhere? from what i have seen skinner is 6 MJ

 

[The_Wright_Way]

Yes. The value is even stated at the bottom of the OP for reference. I can fetch the calc if you like.

 

[GoCommitDi]

sure thing

 

[The_Wright_Way]

https://vsbattles.fandom.com/wiki/User_blog:Buttersamuri/Phoenix_Yeets_the_witness_stand

You'll have to scroll down a bit, the calc has a redo at the bottom.

 

[Stalker_Maggot]

BUmp